hmm...wat so special about today?...
the day i wan to remember for my entire life? hmm nope not really..
my wedding? No u're kidding me weih,im just 18th years old,yea i know is possible but i dont think so....
my 21st BIG BIRTHDAY? still got 2 more years to go...
someone confess to me? HAHAHA....NOPE =.=
date with someone i love? ermm..i do HOPE so...
hang out with my best buddy? errrmmm i did dat almost everyday not everyday but most of the time i do hang out with my best buddy...so nope..
i graduate? i really hope i graduate ad so dat i can work and earn tons of money....
couple with someone i love? haha yea right...=.=
someone give me present dat i really love...? hmm no no no...
i become a millionair or billionair?haha wow...this is impossible even though how i wish one day it will come,there a ppl will say dat why not, miracle do happen, yea i know..hopefully..
hmm none of the above dat i think i would be happy if it do happen..so wat so special about it..?
Actually nothing special, just in my heart i will never forget this day....! Normally friday i dont have class, but i went to college cuz got replacement class for critical thinking skills...after the class, went to the bursary to pay my fees....this is the main point im talking about...but why? why i wan to talk about this day? talk about my fees? i guess u will think dat oh mg god am i crazy.?wat so intesting about my fees? aint no other things to talk about already ..? too free?..NO NO , its not like dat.....my FEES, i really hope i got tons of money now and i dont need to bag u all..see u all face...im not those rich person..my family aint not wealthy...not those high class person..my fees not easy to collect, RM5100 not a small amount not a big amount though...but my mom really work very hard just to let us has a better education has a better life when we grown up...but few days back, she scolded me very badly...because i told her need to pay the fees ad and the due is on fri..she scold me cuz i failed one subject.. and need to pay another Rm1200 more for dat particular subject...she said..who ask u everyday got out ..dun study hard now failed one subject need to pay extra money u think im rich huh? i know u dun have the heart to study ad..why not u stop study and come out to work? i really dun have extra money to give you ad...u noe ur dad very well...if u cannot study, dont study ad...come out to the society and work....if u work...u wan to come back how late also can.i wont care about u....
MOM....u think i cannot study? u think i wan you to pay dat extra money? u think i dun have heart to study? u think i just wan to play not study so i failed one of my subject?u think i wan to failed? u said u are dissapointed of me ?hmmm.....i really very sad and dissapointed and frustrated when i heard dat....i think we less communicate..? yea i think dats how it began....so now u dont trust me, not at all i guess? you dont know wat i thinking you dont even know wat i want? you dont know when i sad when i mad and when i happy?you said i jealous i envious my sister because u provided her the best education, the best college and even university, u sent her study abroad u gave her everything that she wanted u fullfill her wish and everything..u also said my grandfather only sayang her gave her everything ..bought her a car gave her money,watever she want my grandfather will gave her but we dont have ask me and my youger sister dun jealous of our elder sister..No mummy, i dont jealous i dun even envious about my sister...i know ur situation, u can let us study until now is already the best thing u can gave us...but why, why u think i will jealous because u know u cant give me so dat u think i will jealous about it? No i dont...not at all..seriously...!!i very sad u know dat? i know is all my fault dat makes u think like dat cuz i dun communicate with u, i spent most of my time infront of the com and my friends more than my family..i dun talk often at home...u know why? if u ask me why..i cant give u the accurate answer as well, i scared of u? maybe because when ever u talk ure like scolding , if u scold one person the other two will involve as well...or u are like not listening to me...but i really appreciate i have a sister dat i can throw out all my thoughts and feels even though sometimes we will quarrel abit.but sisters no matter wat sure will quarrel abit one right? so dats normal....
and its not like i wan to failed dat subject, i really put most of my effort to study de subject than others subject, even though not really 100% but i really work hard on it...maybe because i dun really uunderstand the subject very well or i dun have interested in the subject or i dun put 100% of my effort on it so i failed...
NO MATTER what happen i still love u, my family...i seriously do love u all..those love dat come from my bottom of the heart...my friends can never replace u alls....even u said i i spent most of the time with my friends than u all do, talk to my friends more than u all, laugh to them more than u all.. but my family will always the 1st place in my heart....well work is different story...different case...it can never be combine with family friends or something else...
Jie...i really will feel sad if u really leave the house...no one i can share my thoughts my feelings to already...i know u dont like to stay any longer in this house already but u think dat is easy if u stay outside alone? no body care for u, no body cook for u, no body talk to you i mean as in like we three like to play together talk eat shopping and so and so....u wont miss us? i dont want the family to separate...i want my family to stay together no matter wat happen....even though sometimes i also thought of leave the house..its really tired to see wat is happening in the house sometimes....but i wont really want to leave....
Anyhow, i wan to thank u all for sponsored me..when i come out to the society work later after i graduate, i will payback u all i mean i will never forget u alls mercy...
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